29 weeks

Hey Jaxton,

I got to see you again today. You were moving so much. Could it have been because I drank a cup of coffee before hand. I’m guessing that may have had something to do with it. you normally are sleeping and covering your face.

I have been spending really great quiet times with with God lately. I can’t explain how I am feeling at such peace. I no longer worry when I don’t feel you moving. I chalk it up to you are sleeping instead of panicking and wondering if today is “the day”. Instead I am looking down at my belly and rubbing you looking to see where you kick me next.

Last I heard from the doctor you are doing fine and we will do an ultrasound at 32 weeks to find out if your liver is in your body or in the Omphalocele. That will determine your delivery method and due date. They are wanting to take you out a week early bc of the O. I am hoping for March 5th (Daddy & Mommy’s anniversary) and that is Trisomy awareness month, but your brother is a February baby so that would be fine too. When ever you come, I’m looking forward to holding you in my arms and near my face giving you lots of kisses.

Every time I look at your pictures or your videos I always comment on how perfect you are and I want to kiss those lips. You had your hands open a lot this session! My favorite part was when you were reaching for your toes. You were flexing and pointing your feet and I could feel it in my tummy.

Fist pump for daddy!

Reaching for your toes. This is so cute to watch on the video.

We got our stockings!!! Look how great they look. Of course I need to get the stockings over the mantle and off the tree, but hey it works for now. I’d also like to get something for the top of the tree (maybe a snowflake)  🙂

It’s an “Extra Special” Boy!

September 29^th – We went to a 3D/4D place to finally find out the gender of our lil nugget of joy. We found out it is a BOY! ☺

But while watching the 4d we also discovered an abnormally large mass extending from the baby’s belly. The technician had never seen anything like it and advised us to show the pictures to our doctor. So we set up an appointment.

September 30^th – We have just learned earlier this morning that God made our baby boy “extra” special. In fact it seems that God may have given our precious baby boy an extra chromosome. This means he probably has some sort of Down Syndrome. Along with the extra chromosome the Dr. expressed concern in other areas too: Umbilical Hernia, Abnormal Heart, Spine and Skull development. I am 18 weeks right now.
He may not make it full term, He may be still born, He may live only a short time or he may live a happy extended life. It’s all in God’s good will.
We wish to know and love this precious boy in every way that we can.
Naturally, I am having a tough time dealing with the recent news. The constant thoughts that I am thinking are endless. I know to trust God in all things and He has a plan bigger than I could imagine. It is just a hard time wondering if we’ll ever get to meet our little guy. Wishing to hold him, nurture him with unconditional love and to slobber him with so many hugs and kisses that he tells us to stop!!! ☺

October 4^th – We had a follow up appointment today with a counselor and a fetal specialist. The counselor went over the information and told us that the previous diagnosis wasn’t exactly what they saw. They are pretty sure it’s not Down Syndrome (which is actually what we were hoping for given the mortality rate of the other options.)

We got positive and negative news:

Positive- Heart and spine are looking perfectly normal!  Yay!

Negative- Our baby boy probably has Trisomy 13 or 18 which both are fatal, and he has sever brain abnormalities which would result in him not being able to function with out tubes or help even if we was to make it full term. His brain is supposed to have a left and right hemisphere distinctly separated; unfortunately, his is all together in the front. (I guess the back is fine). He in fact does have an umbilical hernia and clinched fists. He also only has 1 out of 2 of the umbilical arteries.

So here we are praying that God works a miracle in the health of our baby.  We are so desperate to have God save our 2^nd son and allow him to live a very long and healthy life. We aren’t asking for a free pass or a smooth ride. We know it will be tough. I think we just want to know our baby and love him as much as we do Jake.

I find comfort in knowing that if he did pass in the comfort of my womb that he goes straight to heaven with God and all the other “extra” special babies. And as hard as that is to type with tears filled in my eyes I know it’s true. I know that in the moments when I am crying so hard and I have to remind myself how to breathe that God is in control. This precious life will not go to waste and he has already changed my life.

We are praying with each appointment that we hear more positive news and humbly putting our trust in God.